There was something timelessly appealing about being a child and ripping into that Happy Meal from McDonald’s. That enticing red box laced with cardboard golden arch handles just beckoned you to dig into the contents inside; like opening a treasure box full of greasy riches.
These riches didn’t just include some golden crispy, delicious fries (at least for the first few minutes), a tasty burger, and a refreshing beverage to wash it down, but it had the coup de gras - a unique toy. What made this even more exciting was knowing that these toys were very often limited time deals, and, since they usually were released in bundles, you were typically getting a surprise. These Happy Meal toys have run the gamut in terms of their characteristics (not to mention quality). But the consistent factor is that for nearly 40 years, these simple plastic toys have brought a lot of joy to a lot of kids. It was the perfect little bonus to compliment your lunch.
There have been all sorts of Happy Meals over the decades, and they’ve often proven to be little tokens that represent pop culture and popular franchises during that particular era. As the times have changed, so have these toys; and there have been mixed results over the years. Some have proven to be awesome collectibles, display items, and/or enjoyable toys. Others have us looking back, shaking our collective heads as to how simplistic, cheap, or just plain silly these were and are.
With this list, we will take a look back at some of the highs and lows in Happy Meal history. We’ll examine some of the coolest toys that invoke our nostalgia and/or imagination. In contrast, we’ll also look back and laugh at some of the duds this fast food juggernaut has churned out.
Ridiculously Bad: Gardening Tools
What do you think of when it comes to exciting toys for children?
Surely, basic gardening tools aren’t the first thing that comes to mind in this regard - but the rising fast food corporation supposedly felt that small plastic shovels and buckets would exude fun for kids in the late 80s.
What exactly were you supposed to use these for? Well, included with these cheap little gardening tools was a small package of seeds that could be planted to grow radishes. Because when I think McDonald’s, I think of home-grown radishes. Not surprisingly, these Happy Meals didn’t exactly flourish in popularity.
Ridiculously Bad: Angry Birds
You might say McDonald’s was a little late on the Angry Birds hype train. After all, these Happy Meal toys featuring the mobile game phenomenon came in 2016, many years after the game launched into the stratosphere. Though these toys were, in fact, based specifically on the 2016 Angry Birds film, which was about as big a dud as these cheap toys.
Each Angry Bird critter came with their own launcher, which would end up defective half the time. Assuming it worked properly though, you’d launch the figure onto a handful of cardboard images featured in the game and try to knock them off their respective plastic stands. How exciting…
Extra Cool: Power Rangers And Ninjazords
Outside of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, the Power Rangers were the biggest group of fictional ninjas that permeated 90s culture. McDonald’s created a pretty impressive collection of these mighty morphin’ action heroes in 1995, at perhaps the peak of their popularity.
Being a fan of the TV show, it was a memorable feeling of excitement to land a brand new ranger as a kid. Not only were the rangers fun to play around with, but each came complete with their own even more awesome Zord mech. This was a collection I absolutely felt compelled to complete, and it was quite a cool display to show off once I did.
Ridiculously Bad: Changeables
I suppose it’s fitting (but also a bit redundant) that McDonald’s would feature a Happy Meal toy resembling the food itself. I have vague memories of tinkering with these odd little transforming McDonald’s food items in the early 90s.
I recall being at least mildly amused when popping them open to reveal the weird ambiguous creatures. But any sort of “cool” factor quickly dissipated once you closed these guys up and were left with naught but dull, pointless toys resembling burgers, fries, and nuggets. These things were as weird and nonsensical as they were boring to play with.
Ridiculously Bad: Halloween Buckets
Apparently, McDonald’s sees something valuable in offering buckets around Halloween. But while I can’t speak for most kids, I sure didn’t see much in them. Sure, from a practical standpoint, these could be somewhat useful when going trick or treating, but it’s not like they provided any fun.
And even in terms of practicality, you essentially had a whopping one day out of the year where you can get real use out of these lame monster-faced buckets. For the other 364 days, these things tended to simply collect dust as they sat stored away in your basement.
Extra Cool: Flintstones Toys
Perhaps no Happy Meal toy provides me with as many warm and fuzzy nostalgic memories as these Flintstones toys. Based on the 1994 movie (which is certainly another story in terms of quality), these figures came with neat little plastic characters saddled in cars that actually rolled. Each was coupled with its own neatly carved stone-looking buildings; a few which had detachable doors. My friends and I had quite a good time as young kids collecting all of these things and setting up our own little makeshift town of Bedrock.
Ridiculously Bad: Ronald McDonald Mask
Why does this take on the appearance of something that might be worn in some lame horror film or anarchy-laden action flick like The Purge?
Ronald looks unsettlingly happy in this picture…
This cheaply made, cardboard mask was certainly an odd choice of Happy Meals toys for McDonald’s to launch - not just because of how mundane it is, but considering how many children are scared of clowns. This thing risked being ripped right from the get-go too since you had to tear out the image and punch out holes in the eyes to be able to see past it.
Ridiculously Bad: Popoids
Maybe a few kids got a kick out of these in the 80s, but they likely annoyed plenty of parents. Not only were these robotic, Lego-like pieces easy to lose, but they held very little entertainment value individually. This led kids to beg their parents for more, so they could complete their robot contraption, forcing them to shell out for more Happy Meals.
After all, what was the use in being stuck with a handful of bendable tubular limbs without a figure to attach them to? This drew parallels to the McDonald’s Monopoly game, as it enticed you to “collect them all.” except nobody really won this game…
Extra Cool: Disney Masterpiece Collection
For whatever reason, McDonalds’ peak in Happy Meal toy quality seemed to take place in the early to mid-90s, much like the animation juggernaut Disney. I guess it’s no surprise then, that these dominant forces which had a major impact on kids’ lives, got together and released one of the coolest Happy Meal toys, the Disney Masterpiece Collection.
Not only did these toys, based on some of the best Disney films of the 90s, have movable limbs, but they very much resembled their cartoon counterparts. They even came with some cool VHS replica tapes with detailed box art. These acted as a nice bit of visual flair to complement the toy and made nice display items on your shelf.
Ridiculously Bad: McDonaldland Airport
For whatever reason, the 80s seemed to be littered with some toys that just exuded dullness. With a few exceptions, the company didn’t seem to quite figure out the winning formula for churning out interesting, fun toys until the 90s. These McDonaldland Airport planes proved to be yet another example of this. I mean, just look at these things. You’ve got mundane looking aircraft made of cheap plastic, uniform in bland colors, and mostly static objects… But hey kids, at least the propellers could spin!
Ridiculously Bad: Minions Buckets
What is McDonalds’ fascination with Halloween Buckets? And for that matter, what is society’s fascination with these annoying, unfunny Minions? Take the bland concept of releasing plastic buckets as Happy Meal toys, and fuse them with unlikable animated characters, and you’ve got a truly lame series of toys. You were at least given a sheet full of stickers, which could be plastered onto these pails - so you could at least have a bit of fun with them. Still, at the end of the day, they’re naught but static plastic pails.
Extra Cool: Space Jam Plush Toys
Space Jam was all the rage in the mid-90s, so it’s not surprising that the fast food giant would capitalize on this zany film’s success, with their own line of plush dolls. It was perhaps inevitable, especially since McDonald’s branding was even featured in the movie.
These dolls weren’t revolutionary or anything - as they basically resembled a push doll you might grab from one of those crane machines. Still, they were sizable, and there was a nice variety of characters, which made for a good collector’s item. They were also impressively detailed, and, because of their close resemblance to the characters in the film, young fans of the film enjoyed playing with them. I certainly did growing up.
Ridiculously Bad: American Idol Dolls
Happy Meal toys so often capture historic moments in pop culture. In the case of the mid-2000s, it was the hit TV show, that was winning over millions of people. While the timing of these figures’ release was fitting, these ambiguous, random toys are peculiar for a number of reasons.
For one, how many young kids (which were typically the market for Happy Meals) even watched the show?
Secondly, these weird looking figures didn’t resemble anyone in particular. Rather, they were basic, alien-looking caricatures of “styles” of musicians. They came with wacky names like “Disco Dave” and “New Wave Nigel.”
Ridiculously Bad: Nutritional Books
In the mid-2000s, McDonald’s seemed to be responding to the backlash of the excesses of processed foods, trans fats, sugars, and other greasy eats contributing to the obesity crisis. In a strange sort of juxtaposition that didn’t exactly adhere to McDonald’s grease-saturated menu items, they decided to release 4 colorfully illustrated books for children.
Shouldn’t teaching kids to eat healthy fall more under the jurisdiction of the parents?
These simple books, including “The Goat Who Ate Everything,” were meant to teach kids to eat healthy in a fun way through a basic story. An admirable effort, but Happy Meals are supposed to be synonymous with fun, and I doubt many kids found enjoyment in bland, preachy reading material.
Extra Cool: Teenie Beanies
Anybody growing up in the 90s, and really, even the parents at this time (since they were usually the ones going out and buying them), is well aware of the Beanie Baby phenomenon. These simplistic and cute bean-filled dolls blew up to the point where kids and adults alike were clamoring to snag them all, sometimes even shelling out hundreds of dollars for rare varieties.
NaturallMcDonald’slds got in on the craze at the turn of the millennium, with their even smaller and cuter version - Teenie Beanies. Thanks to the partnership of company Ty, these dolls were of impressively similar quality, and featured a unique lineup of colorful critters, like Strut the rooster and Freckles the leopard.
Ridiculously Bad: Ronald/Birdie Sunglasses
In yet another example of an 80s Happy Meal oddity, McDonald’s apparently saw it fit to pack their trademark Happy Meal boxes with some cheap, uninspiring pairs of sunglasses. These things consisted of goofy facial renditions of Ronald, Birdie, Hamburglar, and Grimace adorning the tops of these sunglasses.
Not only did they look ridiculous when worn, but they weren’t particularly comfortable and were barely functional. If you’re going to make a Happy Meal toy that isn’t fun to use, one would think they’d at least make it a little more practical.
Ridiculously Bad: Play-Doh McDonalds Chicken McNuggets Happy Meal Playshop
I never quite saw the appeal in the bland, malleable substance known as Play-Doh. This is especially the case when said Play-Doh is meant to be pointlessly formed into the shape of McDonald’s food. It’s even color-coded - yellow for fries, brown for McNuggets, etc. This was a pretty dull concept that only the youngest of kids could remotely get into, for one. But you also ran the risk of your young child eating this industrial substance. And no, I’m not talking about the actual food found in Happy Meals.
Extra Cool: Batman Toys
Batman-themed toys have been featured as Happy Meal trinkets on several occasions, and for good reason. Batman has been this ongoing force of a franchise that has entertained kids, teens, and even some adults, for decades. This iconic superhero and his companions also make for neat and colorful looking action figures.
While the 1992 movie, Batman Returns, was questionable in its quality, the line of Happy Meal toys that came out to coincide with its release were certainly memorable. The figures were well crafted and realistic, and they even got their own unique vehicles with rolling wheels.
Ridiculously Bad: American Idol Toys
Since we apparently couldn’t have enough, McDonald’s also released a series of Idol instrument and equipment-based “toys.” These mostly amounted to useless pieces of plastic that resembled something related to the show. Among these were a plastic mic, guitar, and even a basic “MP3 player” that played exactly zilch, aside from the opening theme of the show. This was sure to make for a lot of irritated parents, as kids played this endlessly on a loop.
Ridiculously Bad: Shark Tale Jellyfish
Shark Tale managed to be a fairly popular movie when it hit the scene in 2004. The Happy Meal toys that followed? Erm, not so much. Their ridiculous, lackluster nature was especially apparent with this weird looking purple blunt object, which was supposed to represent a jellyfish from the movie. It just looks extremely strange looking and dull to play with. Usually, toys based on movies (especially animated ones) seem to do well but they simply missed the mark here.
